Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Randomize
