He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
