Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
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