I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
