my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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