The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
