So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
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