She announced her abortion via fbk
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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