it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Small penises have feelings too.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
