the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
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