loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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