It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
