Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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