I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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