Can Purell be used as lube?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Randomize
