I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
