I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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