I'm eating all of the evidence.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
