you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
