last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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