And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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