I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I got inside last night via doggy door
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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