I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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