i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
