we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
