Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Randomize