very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize