Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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