I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
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You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
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Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.