I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
