I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
