Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize