i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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