Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
3 2 1 whiskey
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
