Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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