I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
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He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
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You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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