I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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