I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Randomize