i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
