"it" just moved
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I looked at my own cervix.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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