Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
