Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Randomize
