Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
