I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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