im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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