We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
