i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
