how can u be prego again
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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