Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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