Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize