I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
did you just send me my own nude
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
